A MOMENT IN TIME

Just thinking. I’m about an hour and a half away from needing to be somewhere for a volunteer session I signed up for yesterday. It takes time to get there. I look at the clock and see there is not enough time to: try a new recipe; do additional needle work on the counted cross-stitch piece ; or clean out that file drawer which has sorely lacked my attention. Not sure what to do to fill those empty minutes, I review my options.

  • Well, I could read a book. Nope, not that fond of the book I’m currently trying to finish. (Heaven help me for I am one who has to finish a book once it’s started, even if I find it tedious.)
  • I could work on the one unfinished painting which I recently over-painted. Acrylic paint. It was a landscape so manicured and lacking personality, it made me shiver – not in a good way. I like part of how the over-painting has turned out, but about two-thirds of the canvas still needs to be addressed. Hummm, not enough time, as I can never tell how long the creative juices need to flow to get that painting just “right” for me.
  • Oh, I can play with the cat and put her through her paces. She would like that but realistically she’s done in about five to ten minutes and is off to something else. She dictates how long joint play is to last. That won’t fill the space.
  • Maybe sudoku. A possibility, but lately, while playing, I am easily distracted by whatever else is within my view or hearing. Doesn’t sound like fun.
  • I could call a friend to see what’s going on with life. Not really in the mood. My friend is prone to chatter, making a lengthy call a strong possibility; and, again, I’m not really in the “chattering” mood.

As I go through the list, I find myself unimpressed with any of the options, notwithstanding, they are things I like to do regularly. What is it about today that makes them boring or uninviting? Am I just bored? Or does the activity have to matter?

According to the computer’s uninvited AI, boredom can be defined as “an unpleasant emotional and psychological state where a person feels restless, uninterested, and lacking stimulation or satisfaction with their current activity.” That sounds about right. Wikipedia, after acknowledging that it is difficult to define, suggests that boredom involves how time is experienced and how significant the act is to the person. After spending a few moments more looking at some other sources, I’m left not wanting to delve deeper and decide it’s not boredom. Rather, I simply find myself with an unexpected free slice of time without a plan. There’s always plenty to do – if I wanted to do it and if I really thought about it. I’m sure; and, although there is a nagging feeling that I should be productive with all my time, I pause and remember not every waking moment needs to be “productive”. Things like taking 15 minutes to sit on a back deck watching the trees sway with the wind and noting the birds and such moving about is restorative. Connect with nature. Maybe add time to sip a cup of Earl Grey tea.. Or, dash off a funny note to someone you’ve been meaning to do. Play with the cat or dog. We are so blessed to have options and the freedom to choose how we fill those intermittent, uninvited slices of unclaimed time when they surface. Just thinking.

TEARS

Tears, those visible responses to sadness, happiness, anger, frustration, and even laughter, are awesome. To me, they are God’s built-in universal conveyor belt, physically protecting our eyes from things unwanted and emotionally cleansing our pallet of hurt’s bad taste. I also consider them to be a “memo to self” that something has happened and notice to others that a moment is needed.

Tears coming from feelings of helplessness, sorrow, or frustration release emotions that would be toxic if left to fester. They trickle or gush, depending on how fast they need to escape and how, historically, you allow yourself to respond. On occasion, they make unwelcome reappearances. Flowing tears can serve as a necessary comma in our thought process, giving us a pause or time to consider what is or has happened. Such a needed pause.

On the other hand, tears are not always negative. There is nothing better than hearing or seeing something so funny, you collapse in a fit of non-stop, not-able-to-breathe, tear-producing laughter. And, tears flowing from sheer happiness – heartwarming. These tears recognize and acknowledge the good things life offers notwithstanding whatever else is occurring and reaffirm that pleasure, often from simple things, is there for the taking.

So, for those who know that tears are about to surface, let them flow. God made us with tear ducts which need to be periodically exercised. The ruined makeup, red face, puffy “mouse eyes” will all recover.

For those who witness sad or angry tears, recognize the we each will respond differently – maybe reaching out or pulling back. Past experiences and our own emotions weigh-in, and sometimes, another’s tears open a door in our own heart to places where sorrow has lived before. Just know, there is no one “correct” way to respond. Acknowledge the tears, give a hug or pat on the shoulder, offer Kleenex, say you’ll be with them, or get some water, particularly if you need a break.

Awesome. Tears.

EARLY MORNING

Just thinking. What is it about how we greet the early morning hours?

Are you the one who uses early morning as a quiet time to be enjoyed before the world wakes up? (Before the political pundits begin sermonizing and offering opinions about what’s going wrong or before the constraints of others come into focus.) Yes, indeed, that could be you. For you, the sun has yet to announce its’ presence. A steaming cup of coffee or tea may be at hand, ready to sip. Maybe, there is quiet chatter with a loved one or simply the contemplation of one’s own breathing; and, although the dog and cat each have a way of letting you know you are on their mind, they can be ignored for the moment. No rush. Peace abounds. This new day will come.

Or do you use that early morning time in “full-bore” mode. When it strikes, everyone is up and rearing for the day’s activities to get started. Caffeinated beverages are quickly inhaled and breakfast consumed. The air is filled with news channel chatter or music to get the juices going, and things to be accomplished are quickly identified. My guess is that the dog has already been walked, and the cat is either at play or back sound asleep. The birds outside, well, they are noisily tweeting at one another. Out the door you go. All prepared. The new day awaits.

For sure, the ways to greet the early morning are a diverse as we are. Options are unlimited including, possibly, the option of sleeping through it all. The really cool thing about the early morning is that we choose what we to do with that time. No right or wrong here. Although, upcoming activities, habits, patterns, values and possibly planning skills certainly play into the picture, we each have the opportunity to: figure out what approach to starting out day suits us best, define how our time is to be used, and act accordingly. Choices. The blessed early morning repeatedly, day after day, gives us those opportunities. Choices – here for the taking. Don’t you love that about it?

Ouch

Ouch.

It hurts.

Gut is wrenched.

The words you spoke.

Left me without any recourse.

What was it that hurt most?

The false promise of things to be?

Or your intent to never act on it?

So hard to tell – was it rudeness or indifference?

I only know your lack of honesty shows.

What happens here is left to me.

Do I respond in like kind?

No; you are moving on.

You should know better.

You should know.

You know.

Ouch.





SOUTHERN SUMMER STORM

Summer.

Storm Coming.

Heavy. Stiffling. Heat.

I can feel it.

You feel it too, right?

The wind ruffles the tree branches.

Thunder’s low rumble gives us fair notice.

Lightning leaps across the sky; thunder now crashes.

Danger. Rain is pelting. Incessant lightning and thunder. Danger.

The front’s fury is too much to bear.

I hide my eyes – seeking safety within.

Wind calms down. Thunder now whispers.

Rain – only a soft patter.

See – clouds are evaporating.

Sun peeking through.

All gone.

Summer.